A Good Day

A Good Day

A friend of mine once asked me what I would do if I had 50 bucks and all day to spend.  My response: Find a place out of the way so that I can write.  Preferably in a cafe where people wouldn’t recognize me on sight (though let’s be honest here, I swear I run into someone I know no matter where I go,) where I can get some words written.
Writing words, at least for me, is what I do love to do.  That and doing God’s work, but let’s focus on one thing at a time here.  I like to tell stories, and not in the I’m-telling-a-lie kind of way.  I like to think and listen and get new perspectives on things.  I like to take said new things I learn and use them to make the people who I write about better as characters.
I want to make the stories I write as real as every story I read when I was a child.  Getting lost inside a story to escape bad times or to understand new and interesting things is so much fun for me.  And I can see why people say that it is fun, but once you fully buy into this belief… then it becomes fun.

Problem: I have too many stories I want to write.
Solution: Just write more!
Problem: I don’t have time to write.
Solution: Forget about your responsibilities!
Problem: I’m failing all my classes cause I would rather write.
Solution: uhhhh…

So being honest here, I’m not failing my classes.  Just hyperbolatin’ here.  Cause I would rather write my own stories and ideas than to read boring ol’ literature that I really don’t care about.  I can balance all of this with my “social” and church and personal life because right now my job is to be a student and to learn from those better than myself.  Of course, if I had an actual job with actual payment in actual money that would be nice too.  But that means I would have to cut something off.  Which would most likely be my writing.  But at the same time, I know my own personal life will suffer and my own hardships will get 100x more deadly because I didn’t do x, y, or z thing beforehand.
So maybe I can suffer right now and write and get my homework done and be a good Christian and be a good person and friend.  But that can’t last.  I need to find a way to connect all these dots into one cohesive plan.  And, as the saying goes, the first casualty of war is your plan.
And I have all of these good ideas too! I have ideas for poetry and personal essays and creative nonfiction and fiction of a billion sorts and concepts and thoughts and OH DEAR GOSH ZACK PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER!!!

Nano is coming up.  I doubt that I will actually compete this year.  I say that but I competed last year anyways and failed miserably.  I know in my heart of hearts that the same is going to happen this year.  Part of being a selfless person is that I want to help others and make sure they are the best they can be.  Part of what makes me whom I am goes beyond the stories I want to tell.
So for now?  I guess I suffer and try to write.  It’s akin to not running for your runners out there, or not video-gaming for you obsessed video-gamers out that.  I dunno.  I guess I’ll just write things out and see where things go.  And maybe I should organize the mess I have.  Maybe I should “document” which stories and all that need to be done.  Cause right now a lot of em are in my head, and that isn’t necessarily healthy…